My Mom

The Family 1978

Notice how I am looking down and not smiling.

Linda Sue Miller Hard.  Born May 1 1949 died April 19 1985.

My Mom truly helped shape me into the human I am today.  And even though I only knew her for 16 yrs she had an enormous impact on my life.  Not just because she was my Mom, but because she had an enormous impact on everyone she met.

Ironically, she was so full of life.  Even at the end.  She loved to have fun, to laugh and she loved being a care taker to those who could no longer care for themselves.  She became a nurse in 1978.  She worked with the elderly up until the year before she died.  She had went to work for TDC just about 6 months before she died.

But when she drank it was awful!  It was like Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde and alcohol was her poison.  She would become so angry and break things and scream.  Good lord would she scream.  She had horrible impulse control and would do the strangest things.

Chaos!

When I was about 6 or 7 she put all of us kids in the car.  She had been drinking and she had decided to leave Dad.  She started the car and then went back inside.  I have no idea how long she was inside but my brother, Erskine, decided to crawl over into the drivers seat.  He was only about 2 or 3 yrs old.  He hit the emergency brake and the car rolled back into the woods.  We sat in that car for I do not know how long!  Finally Dad found us.  You might be asking yourself, where was your Mom?  Who the hell knows!  I laugh now, but then I was petrified!

Chaos.  Always chaos!

She was such an interesting woman and she loved saving other humans.  This funniest thing she ever told me was “Veronica, you can’t save the world until you save yourself.”  It is funny because I think she was trying to save the world in her own strange way.

I know my Mom was a good friend to those who were in her life.  Her best friends Edith and Peggy stood by her through thick and thin.  They are still keeping up with us kids to this day and are now here for us when we need them.  Only because of my Mom are we lucky enough to have people like them in our life.

Sadly, I do not think she saw herself as good at all.  I truly believe she wanted to be good, which is why she became a nurse.

I miss her.  Even the chaos.  For years I recreated that chaos my life.  I almost mimicked her but with out the use of alcohol.  I just never could drink very much :).

I guess I am a lot like her.  I have a savior complex too, but mine is saving dogs.  I also fight with finding the good in me.  I work daily on discovering as much good in me as I can.  I know I am also a good friend.  I have some of the best friends in the world.  And the only way you can have good friends is to be a good friend!

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